Overcoming the Pull of My Phone 

Recently, I came across a quote by Jessica Seinfeld that made me take a hard, honest look at myself.

Wow.  How many times have I been guilty of this one? My first reaction was to rationalize it by thinking “I’m a blogger…my business is my phone, and social media!”  But the reality is that I was a phone addict long before I started blogging. Over the years, my phone has become a sort of “social armor” that I hide behind in situations when I’m bored, feeling uncomfortable, or just don’t know what else I should be doing! Dull moment in a restaurant? Time to check Facebook! Stuck on documentation at work? Time to scroll through my Instagram feed! When I get together with friends or coworkers, I’m often scrolling through my phone to show them the latest pictures of Bella…all without considering how rude it comes across. 😔

My phone has replaced so many things that made me, me! I have always loved reading, and I would look forward to going to the library and returning home with a stack of 5-10 new books to read. Payday Friday always came with the added treat of a trip to Barnes & Noble for a new Philippa Gregory book.  Now, I just download every book through iBooks. There is nothing inherently wrong with that, but it’s amazing how quickly my phone replaced longstanding traditions in my life, all without me noticing! The same can be said about my phone camera. I was on vacation recently, and looking back, I realize I spent the entire trip with my phone raised, taking photos. Again, nothing wrong with this, but I’m realizing that I spend more time curating moments than actually living them. 

Living life's momentsSo Socialites, I’ve decided that I’m going to take back some of my power that I’ve lost through my phone. I’m going to make a conscious effort to keep my phone facing down when I’m out with others. I’m going to fill awkward silences with caring conversation, and encourage others to do the same. I’m going to join my daughter in all of her adorable moments, instead of just racing to film them. I’m going to stretch my brain and commit important phone numbers to memory again, rather than adding them to my contacts (if I could remember them at 12, I can do it at 34…I’m just sayin!) I’m going back to the library and checking out books again, and I’m going to be the example for my daughter that there is more to life than the phone!

I know that the phone is an important part of our lives, and I hope I haven’t stepped on anyone’s toes, because I am just taking inventory of things that I need to do for me. But I invite you to join me in this #breakupwithmyphone moment! Let’s make #phonefacedown a thing! Leave me a comment below. 👇🏾

See ya next time!

69 thoughts on “Overcoming the Pull of My Phone 

  1. its so hard – i try to leave my phone in my purse while at dinners, if i do need it out i turn it over! but it does suck that we have to be on our phone to stay relevant in this business!

  2. I am a phone addict to ! I still found myself turning my phone back on it’s front so I have to keep it in my bag ! You are right it is an important part of business but we do need breaks from them to give our eyes rest if anything !

    1. I am such an addict! It’s funny that you mentioned about giving our eyes a break. I just read an article about how the phone lights disrupt our Melatonin production, which in turn affects how we sleep.

  3. I completely agree. It’s one thing to keep your phone handy in case of emergency, but checking it constantly when you’re out with friends is my biggest pet peeve. Pay attention to the people around you! When I go home to my parents’ house, I normally turn it off for my entire stay.

    1. That’s what motivated me to think more about my actions; I would hate to be someone’s pet peeve! Thanks so much for reading!

  4. I’m exactly the same, even though I don’t want to I’m constantly looking at my phone, mind numbingly pulling my emails down every ten minutes to see if I received anything new. It’s so funny that you came up with #phonefacedown – when I don’t want to be disturbed whilst I’m watching something I do this, but I can never resist turning it up to check every now and then.

    1. I agree! It is sooo hard to put the phone down! I’m the same way with Instagram, as you are with emails. Yes to #phonefacedown…I hope it works for me! Thanks for reading!

  5. yep i’m a phone addict too! My boyfriend HATES it if i pull my phone out during anytime but work time lol I’m one of those people who will hold their phone in their hand n just swipe for no reason , even when there’s nothing going on in my phone haha

  6. It is so easy to just chalk it up to, “this is my job,” but you are 100% right. I am also guilty of realizing that I have given up other hobbies without knowing it simply because I’ve been so distracted by my phone.

  7. Oh this is so me. I need to stop and remember to be more present esp with my kids… its so easy to just whip out the phone and check it when they are serving me another pretend meal. thanks for the reminder!

  8. I totally got rid of my cell phone a few years ago. It seemed I was always on it. Now I look at my children toting their phones with them I believe the pull on them is very strong

  9. Oh this is so relateable. I am so guilty of doing the same! We need to reclaim our power and become more present in the moment. I am definitely joining you on the #phonefacedown!
    Thanks for the inspiration 🙂

  10. This is a habit that I have been trying to break! I turn all notifications off to help, but I still find myself checking my phone way too often. This is a great read, thanks!

  11. Good for you! I’m someone who always checks my phone at the door around friends and family. I only pull it out after everyone else has and I make a comment and they all continue to do their scroll. I find it’s so nice to actually be in the moment and capture them for memory rather than viewing them through a phone otherwise you miss some of the magic that makes life life <3

    xo Jannine | http://www.happystylishfit.com

  12. Oh wow. You read my mind. I just commented on another blogger’s post about how my phone is always in my hand. I can’t blame social media for the past 3 months but prior to that it was my 9-5 job. You are now the 3rd person who’s saying the same thing and it can’t be coincidence. So there’s a definite need for change. Thanks for sharing this.

  13. I’ve been trying to do this for the past months and one of ways that helped me put my phone down was I installed some of the apps lol! Hopefully I can stop this addiction before the year ends.

  14. Oh my goodness, I needed to hear this today. As a business owner I am constantly glued to my phone, not only is it bad for my health and well-being, it is so detrimental to my relationships. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

  15. ha, one of my biggest pet peeves with people. Listen, especially as a blogger, if we’re always on our phones, we’re not going to have anything to blog about! I keep a strict schedule for my “social media time”, and then just forget about it when I go out.

  16. That Jessica Seinfeld quote is awesome. I try very hard to leave my phone in my bag and not use it. I usually only allow myself to use it for the camera and using a lens makes it clear to others I’m taking pictures.

  17. I have a confession. I’m addicted to my phone. I seriously would get lost without it. I even pull it out in class, that’s how bad it is. Gosh I need to put my phone away. Eye-opening post thanks.

  18. Nice article! I can see everyone is able to relate it to themselves (ha..ha.). But if you can actually spent a whole day without your phone you will see that it is not really an addiction. All you need to do is just pay little more attention to other things around you. If we can actually pay attention to everything that is happening in the nature, you will see there are too many things to get engrossed with. It’s a gadget after all to make things easy for us, we don’t have to get addicted! Right ? 🙂 Having said all this I agree it’s a big addiction and I have it too….LOL We must get rid of this habit. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on it. A very well written article 🙂 Enjoyed it

  19. First, amazing name for a blog. And second I so agree. I have a love hate relationship with my phone. It causes me anxiety, but then I can’t get away from me. I do make an effort to “facedown in the evening after I do my blog check ins

  20. Phones and social medias are things society today just can’t leave without. It’s a common disease everyone has. I totally agree with you that there’s more to life than phone. It’s time for a phone detox!

  21. I thought I was addicted to my phone but I recently started a new job where you aren’t allowed to have your phone out on your desk. I was dubious at first but it really has helped me not pull my phone out at every opportunity, both in the workplace and at home.

  22. We have become a society of digital, we have forgotten how to be human, have real-life social conversations, and just living the moments without having your camera up. It’s sad really. I think we are loosing a lot. (Myself included!) Been to bali recently, on my honeymoon, and for the first time, in a very long time, I feel I was able to absorb all the goodness it had to offer, because I was not stressing about getting the next best shot! It was a wonderful vacation!

  23. Our age of technology has certainly brought convenience to our lives, but it has also taken over in many respects, as you have articulated so well. When you read stories about people suffering injuries or even death because they weren’t paying attention – they were on their phones and looking down instead of at where they were going or what they were doing – it really is alarming!

  24. I’ve experienced not having a phone for two years and I have alternatives which are computer and laptop. I’m still dependent on these technologies. Now that I have my phone here, instead of writing a to-do list on my notebook when there’s an assignment or project given, I take my phone and enlist them on Google Keep! Although when I’m talking to somebody or seeing an epic event I try to use my phone less, which is good! Practice makes perfect, so I hope you get rid of that clinging habit.

  25. Because me ex-husband constantly had his phone out at meals and social situations and I found this rude, I made myself the rule that unless there was some vital need my phone would stay in my bag.

  26. These is so true. I am phone addicted too because I use it when I make blogs if I do not carry my laptop or when i’m home. And I needed my phone in doing social media chores.

  27. Omg this is super true. I share the same sentiments with you and I even get “kilig” (a Filipino term that means excited or elated) when whoever I’m with isn’t bringing out his/her phone. I feel that our time is really valued, and as for me, I make the conscious effort not to be the first too! Exactly like what you mentioned! 🙂

  28. I remember when we didn’t have cell phones. We probably should have stopped at the pager lol. Phones have dumbed down society and yes we are all addicted. I miss rushing home to get that special call. Now I ignore calls and always feel like I don’t have time to myself because someone can always call. Then if you don’t answer they send you a text.

  29. This is really my story now!
    It has been an issue with my hubby that I should stay away from my phone more often. It really a good thing to have breaks from this necessary evil because the adverse effect is huge….strained eyes and all.

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